A One-Sided Heartstring Tug
by redhead414
Summary: James/Sirius romance submission for the 2013 Quidditch League Fanfiction Tournament. Prompts required for this story include a mirror, the quote "We can't do that!" and the quote "Sometimes, your life boils down to one insane move." Just a small little story about unrequited love. Word Count - 2919 before the author's note (3000 word max).


_**Before my readers wonder if I've lost my mind - I signed up to be a part of this Quidditch League Fanfic Competition and it started this week. I've never done anything like this before, but it seems to be exciting and my team (Ballycastle Bats) is awesome. We're assigned the rules for our prompts (and the pairing) which was how this story came to be. Even if this pairing not your cup of tea...I still wouldn't mind the support! -Redhead414  
**_

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**Team: **Ballycastle Bats  
**Position: **Beater #2  
**Pairing: **James/Sirius - Romantic  
**Prompts:** [dialogue - "We can't do that!] [dialogue - "Sometimes, your life boils down to one insane move."] [object - mirror]  
**Word Count before A/N:** 2919 words

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"Dance with me."

"Me?"

"No, the other best man."

Sirius laughed as he yanked the bow tie away from his neck. He was over that particular piece of garment the moment James tied it around his neck earlier that day in the hotel suite. Never had his face ever been so close to James than in that moment, with his chin jutted up ever so slightly while the groom concentrated on keeping his best man from looking like a total slob. Sirius caught Remus staring at him through the mirror with a knowing look, subtly shaking his head, and he couldn't help but sigh. He didn't need Remus reminding him that James' wedding day - of all days - was not the moment to confess the fact that he'd been in love with him for the past three years.

"Sirius? Are you listening to me?"

He snapped his attention back to the auburn headed bride standing in front of him, a vision that would make a Grecian Goddess green with envy. She extended a slender hand towards him and Sirius felt like he had no other choice than to take it. "I reckon a dance can't kill me."

"I would certainly hope not," Lily replied with a giggle. "Besides - it's my wedding day - which means you have to do what I want. It's a rule."

Sirius allowed Lily to drag him out onto the dance floor, placing a proper hand against her back as he learned how to do in cotillion all those years ago. He held her hand gently, leading her in a slow dance around the floor. "Marriage looks good on you," he said with a small smile.

Lily smiled, giving Sirius' hand a gentle squeeze. "Thank you, Sirius. That means a lot coming from you."

"Why's that?"

She shrugged slightly. "I don't know. I just feel like you've been distant ever since we announced our engagement. James practically had to duel you into saying yes to being his best man - which completely baffled me, by the way - considering you've been best friends your entire life."

Sirius looked down, watching his shoes like a nervous, novice dancer. "I uh, well, I didn't think I'd be around to be honest. I had plans after graduation to travel."

"Travel where?" Lily asked.

"It doesn't really matter now," he mumbled, looking up, and anywhere at Lily. Sirius knew she would see right through him if he let her. He spotted Peter across the way, making a poor attempt to strike up a conversation with Lily's horrid sister, Petunia, while Remus and James were having a good laugh with Mr. and Mrs. Evans. "I think someone should tell Peter that your sister will probably give him a good slap if he keeps bugging her."

Lily looked over her shoulder and saw Petunia scowling at the poor boy, his hair all askew as he tried to get her sister to respond to anything he was saying. "I'm sure he'll get the hint eventually."

"When she smacks those lumps he calls cheeks."

"Probably," Lily replied with a laugh.

The two of them continued to dance, Lily eventually closing the gap between them as she rested her pointed chin on the top of his shoulder. Sirius didn't mind. With her head out of the way he could watch James without being obvious, wishing he was standing next to him, laughing with his new in-laws at whatever joke seemed to be the center of their amusement.

"You could have brought a date, you know."

"What?"

"A date," Lily repeated. "James was supposed to tell you that you could bring a guest."

"I know," Sirius distantly replied.

He felt Lily recoil back, looking at him as if she were trying to figure out a puzzle. "Sirius?"

"Lily?"

"Don't mock me - it's my wedding day," she retorted. "What's the matter with you?"

Sirius did his best attempt at a nonchalant shrug. "Nothing's the matter."

"That's a load of bollocks and you know it," she snapped. "Just tell me the truth, before I tell it to you."

Sirius laughed as the two stopped dancing. "You don't know anything, Lily Evans."

"Potter," she corrected him, "And I know a whole lot more than you think I do."

Grabbing him by the hand, she gave him a good yank to get his feet moving, and lead him out of the busy ballroom and down a corridor, ducking into what appeared to be an empty conference room inside the wedding venue. She yanked him inside just before catching his foot in the door. "Merlin's beard, you mental bird!" he yelped, shaking his hand out of her freakishly strong grasp. "What's the matter with you!"

"What's the matter with you!" she shouted back.

Sirius raked a hand through his curly, chin length hair and sighed. "Nothing is wrong with me."

"Liar," Lily said, her tone losing some of its bite.

"You have no idea what you're talking about."

"I saw you," she said, her voice soft, and slightly timid. "I saw you today, in the ceremony. Staring at him."

"Him?"

"James," Lily carefully spoke. "I saw you staring at him, right before you handed him my ring."

It wasn't just before he handed over the wedding band to James that he was staring. Remus slyly kicked him in the back of the knee at one point during the vows. Considering Remus was the only one who knew his secret, he couldn't be mad. After all, Remus was only trying to keep Sirius from blowing his cover on a day where emotions were running high, the alcohol never ending.

"_We can't do that!" Remus shouted earlier that day, snatching the bottle of Firewhiskey from his hand back at his flat. "Afterwards, yes, but not right now!_

"_Sure we can!" Sirius said, attempting to snatch the bottle back with little success._

_Remus capped the bottle and kept it within an arm's reach of his friend. "It isn't even noon yet."_

"_Listen," Sirius said, taking a step closer to Remus as they stood in the kitchen of his small flat in Hogsmeade. "Sometimes, your life boils down to one insane move. Or moment. Yes. A moment. Maybe that moment is transforming into a werewolf at every full moon. Maybe, it's announcing to the ENTIRE bloody school in the middle of the Great Hall that you're going to get married to the Head Girl after graduation." Just as he saw Remus' shoulders drop in sympathy, he reached out quickly and snatched the bottle back from Remus, tore the poorly screwed cap off, and took a long swig of the amber liquid. "And sometimes, that moment is getting piss drunk and having your mate sober you up before you're forced to stand and watch the love of your life marry someone else." Sirius got in another good swig before he felt the bottle snatched from his hands once more. "You're a terrible friend."_

"_I'm really not."_

A crushing hug around his midsection snapped Sirius back to reality. Knowing it was Lily, he didn't know what else to do but hug her back, so he did, swallowing the lump in his throat and willing the tears that he never wanted to cry away from his eyes. "I'm sorry," he said rather hoarsely.

"I'm sorry," Lily echoed as she pulled away. "I'm sorry I didn't see it sooner."

"Because knowing sooner would have mattered?"

"I would have made James lay off of you about being his best man," Lily added with a sad smile. "Today must be torture for you."

A rueful laugh escaped his throat. "Only a little bit." He walked over to the wall and slid down to the floor, his knees bent as he leaned back. It only took a moment for Lily to join him as she plopped down right next to him. "You're going to wrinkle your dress."

"So?" she said. "I have a wand. It'll fix."

He laughed. "I reckon it will."

Lily linked an arm with him and leaned her head against his shoulder, the two of them sitting in silence. Severus was always making jokes about Sirius' sexuality, and she always told him to knock it off - back when they were on speaking terms, that is - and she always thought he was doing it out of spite. Lily had heard Sirius talk about girl after girl, though if she gave it a good thought, she'd realize that it was only talk. "Sirius?"

"Yeah?"

"Why didn't you say something sooner?" she asked.

Sirius shrugged. "I guess I figured having him as a best friend was better than not having him as anything."

Lily looked up at him and gave him a sweet kiss on the cheek. "You're better than me then," she told him. "I couldn't do it. It would hurt too much."

"You get good at it after awhile," he lamely joked. Sighing, he looked over at Lily, and gave her a reassuring smile. "He's so in love with you," he said, almost enviously. "I remember when he told me back in fifth year that he was going to find a way to convince you to date him."

Lily blushed. "He was rather persistent."

"Only you could get him to lay off of pestering Snivelly Snape," Sirius teased.

"Don't call him that," Lily quietly replied.

"How can you defend him?" Sirius asked. "I mean honestly - he's practically becoming the Dark Lord's right hand man -"

"Stop it," Lily quickly cut him off. "Not today. _Please_."

"Alright," he agreed, reluctantly standing as he spoke. Sirius held his hands out to the bride and gracefully pulled her up to her feet. "We should probably go back to the party before people start to talk."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Like I'd be caught snogging you and your scruffy mug. You could have at least found yourself a razor this morning."

"Drinking and shaving don't mix," he explained, shoving his hands into the pockets of his Muggle tuxedo jacket as he followed her out of the empty room.

She made a face at him while they walked towards the reception area. "What sort of crazy person drinks in the morning, anyway?"

"The kind that's about to watch the love of his life marry someone else - and trust me - the time of day suddenly doesn't matter," Sirius admitted with a scoff. "Lucky for you, Lupin is a ruddy killjoy."

"Excuse me!"

Lily spun around on a heel while Sirius froze in place, not daring to look back behind him. His ears told him that voice was James, and the way Lily reacted confirmed it. Standing still, he inhaled slowly and exhaled deeply, his hands burrowing deeper into his pockets.

"Where were you two?" James asked.

"I just needed some air," Lily said effortlessly. Sirius couldn't see, but he imagined her walking over to him, placing a hand right against his chest like she always did to keep James from blowing his top. "You were talking to Mum and Dad, and so Sirius offered to escort me out for a moment."

"You sure?" he heard James inquire. "Because that's not what it _sounded _like."

He hoped Lily was rolling her eyes at him, just as she did to him on numerous occasions - most of which were warranted. "You can't judge a conversation you know nothing about, James. Now walk me back into the reception hall and stop being a prat."

"Then why won't he turn around?" James asked. "Why is Sirius standing there like he's been petrified?"

"James," Sirius heard Lily said quietly. "Please - let's just go back to the party."

"No - I don't think I will."

"James, please -"

"It's fine," Sirius spoke, having no idea how he even got himself to speak. Exhaling, he turned around; hands still in his pockets, and stared at his best friend. James had a ridiculous scowl on his face while Lily stood just as he thought she would be, right at his side, with a placating hand on his chest. "Oh for Merlin's sake - wipe that bloody look off of your face before I do it for you."

James adjusted the wire-rimmed glasses on his face. "No, I don't think I will. Is this really why you've been such a bloody stick in the mud this past year? Are you in love with Lily?"

He could hardly contain the laugh that rolled past his lips. "Lily? No mate, I don't love Lily. I mean, I love her, but as a sister."

Almost looking relieved, James immediately went back on the defense as he threw a hand in his direction. "Well then what in the hell were you just saying when I walked up here about watching the love of your life get married, or whatever you were saying."

Sirius didn't say anything, but Lily smoothed her hand out over James' maroon tie and whispered something in his ear. He didn't bother watching, and instead retreated his eyes to the ground. He didn't see Lily leave the two of them alone, the sound of her swiftly swishing of her chiffon dress moving with each step being his cue. When silence took over again, Sirius summoned the courage to look up, seeing James with an utterly baffled look about him.

"Sorry," Sirius muttered with a shrug.

"Is sorry even an appropriate response?" James asked, completely bewildered.

Sirius shrugged again. "Probably not…but it's all I've got at the moment. Lily uh…figured it out I guess earlier, and that's why we walked off. Sorry."

"Stop saying sorry."

"Sorry."

"Sirius!"

"What am I supposed to say!" Sirius' voice bellowed, his hands jolting out of his pockets and into the air like lightening bolts. "You were never supposed to find out!"

Neither said anything for a moment, but right as Sirius was ready to start explaining, he found his best friend approaching him in long, quick strides. He winced, terrified for a moment that he was about to get punched but instead, opened his eyes and felt his best friend giving him a strong hug. _One - two - three - four - five - six_ were the seconds Sirius counted in his head before James let go.

James' braced his hands against Sirius shoulders. "You're my best mate," James said with complete seriousness, then furrowing his brow slightly. "But…I like girls."

Sirius laughed. "Yeah - I figured that much out for myself - but thanks for making it official."

"No - that's not what I meant," James backtracked. "I know you know I like girls, well, one girl, and I love her, but what I'm trying to say that is that I'm…I'm a terrible mate for not realizing this before now."

"I'm usually better at hiding it," Sirius said, trying to make James feel better. "And I didn't mean for you to ever find out…and if you were to ever find out, I definitely wasn't looking for today to be that day."

James chuckled, moving his hands back as he watched his best friend. "I'm just relieved you weren't harboring a secret crush on my wife."

"Definitely not."

"Well…" James said with a sigh. "Does this have to change things?"

Sirius hesitated for a moment before speaking and shrugged. "You tell me."

James shrugged as well. "I mean, as long as you aren't going to try to snog me, I reckon I don't really care."

"I've suppressed the urge for this long, therefore I'm sure I can continue," Sirius sarcastically replied.

"If that's the case, can we please get back to the party? I've got three galleons on the fact that Prissy Petunia is going to punch Pettigrew in his fat face before the night's over, and I will be completely beside myself if I miss it," James said, practically pleading.

Chuckling, Sirius nodded, and walked in tandem with James back into the ballroom. The band was playing a fast, upbeat tempo number and before he could blink, James gave him one final clap on the shoulder before jogging out to the dance floor, grabbing his bride with a swooping arm and spinning her around. He stopped in his tracks, and felt a twinge tugging at his heart as James and Lily looked at each other as if they were the only two people in the world.

Remus approached him, carrying two drinks in his hand as he nodded towards the dance floor. "Lily says he knows."

"Yep."

"Do you feel any better about it?" Remus asked. "It's not a secret anymore."

Sirius kept his eyes on the middle of the dance floor, watching as James spun Lily around before dipping her back, placing a lingering kiss to her lip before pulling her back upright. "I don't know."

Remus handed him the glass of scotch in his hand and gave his friend a reassuring side hug. "If it's any consolation, I figure you can get drunk now."

He downed the glass of scotch, then the other before Remus could protest. "Good. The sooner the better."


End file.
